It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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