I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
