I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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