are you still at the devil's house?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
