Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize