So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
