if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
