Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
