you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Randomize
