ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
The beer is more important than you right now.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
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