Define "chronic" masturbator.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
