If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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