Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
