So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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