The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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