whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
