what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
