She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
