So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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