Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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