I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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