so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
