why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
