Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
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