I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
