AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize