i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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