Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
