Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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