everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
