dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
You know, be my cock's hype man.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
you are never too drunk for berry picking
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
