ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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