So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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