Me too!
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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