I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
