remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize