i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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