You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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