therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
