yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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