Michael Bay diarrhea
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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