dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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