I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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