O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I just found a bag of teeth...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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