i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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