I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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