Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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