You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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