she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
