These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
My feet surprised me
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
